In this fast-paced world of 24-hour rolling news, 45-second boiled rice and 8.5-hour train trips from Brighton to Portsmouth, we rarely get the chance to just sit back and well, not smell the coffee (see Starbucks’ AGM tomorrow for evidence of how ALL we do is smell the coffee) but perhaps take time to look at the flowers and so on.
Rather than wait until we’re ill, or stuck on a train to Portsmouth, it transpires that extensive hill walking is the way to go. Slow and steady wins the race and hiking up Kilimanjaro takes place at the kind of speeds that would make the shifting of battle lines across the Somme look like the Anglo-Zanzibar war (45 minutes - the navy was one yacht).
This is a concern for someone with high-level qualifications in walking around London, whose natural walking speed tends towards the blurry-for-onlookers. Blurry with a threat of violence at the edges.
The reason for this is to try and prevent the onset of the madness/vomiting. I, however, have concerns that it will instead foster the madness, not to mention a bought of rucking amongst the London residents in the fashion of Northern Line commuters.
Our one hope is to develop a series of hobbling foot wounds. To this end, we will be hiking from Hassocks to Lewes this weekend (nine miles) in our new boots. Job done.
What we have learned:
There are many, many websites that will plot hobbling walks for you
If you walked at normal speeds, you could get up Kilimanjaro in your lunch break. Perhaps
Boot update:
Almost heavy enough to slow movement to required speeds
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